Our Aspergers Teenage Boy

Tommy refusing to help around the house in anyway. Anything “fun” that we suggest he just says “no” to. He only wants to play the electronic games and nothing else will do. We have said he could play them if he will do some chores and he refuses. He “only wants to sleep” so we said he could sleep on the hammock and he said “ok” and went outside in his shorts. It is currently 39 degrees F/ 4 degrees C with a windchill making it 34 degrees F/ 1 degree C.

I printed outlines for all the chapters in Tommy’s science book and need to find a binder to organize them. Tommy has done his homework and is now grousing vehemently because the only things he wants to do are PS2, computer games or cartoons. I suggested reading, toys or helping out around the house to earn some PS2 time. Dad suggested he jump on the trampoline or ride his bike. Tommy has chosen to flop in his bed and read Garfield books. He wants to play electronic games or nothing. He refuses to help out with any kind of chores. He says it’s not his job. I think he plans on playing games, overeating and oversleeping for all of his life.

Sounded like he was talking to himself. He is on the phone with his biological father. He calls him whenever he is bored. He usually comes off the phone call aggitated.

Tommy now wishes to wander the neighborhood looking for someone to play with. He’s gone door to door before asking if there were kids his age at each house. He was going to wear shorts and got angry and snapped at me “I don’t have any long pants” when several times this past week I’ve physically moved his jeans to the top of the clean clothes. He notices his mother had followed them and put them on the couch so he changes his tone and says “oh, I see some now.”

It old him instead of walking the neighborhood looking for people to play with why not set a goal of walking to the firehouse and back then he can count that as his exercise for today and maybe he will see people out and about. That apparently soured the deal. He shock his head, started bouncing his body against the wall, frowned and said “no. I don’t think so.”

Now he’s just in the glider upstairs rocking and making noise.

Tommy’s definition of not playing video games was to park himself in front of the television watching The Simpsons Season 1. I’ve asked him to 1) let the dog in when she starts bark (now barking for 3 minutes) and 2) think of something that doesn’t use electricity to do.

Tommy finally pulled himself together enough to do his science project. It’s 34 degrees outside right now but he insisted on going outside in shorts and that’s a lesson better learned than fought. His mother insisted on a jacket and he went out and collected soil samples in the yard. The assignment asked for 2. I prompted for a 3rd one since both of his samples came from around the front door. And he ended up doing 4. A good variety too! The one by the door is top soil. The other by the door is dug up dirt from 4-5 feet below ground where we are digging a french drain. One is in the lower lot by the creek and one is from right behind the house (where I am pretty sure the old septic tank sits).

They should have fun with those! We denied him video games for the day and denied him from playing with (bothering) the adult neighbor. So now he is at a loss for what to do with himself.

Tommy was asked to do his homework so he went to his bed lied down and began reading Kingdom Hearts Official Strategy Guide. I took it away after standing there a second and giving him the chance to make the choice on his own. I went up a little later and he’s just lying there so I ask him to go outside to wake up in the cold. He proceeds to yell and fuss finishing with a loud scream at me in front of the baby. I have held it together well up to this point and I follow him to the porch, get in his face and shout “you will not speak to me that way boy” which really upsets him because he hates being called “boy” so he breaks into tears then when I get inside screams “I have a name!”

He has come back inside while I was typing. I was going to invite him back in after I typed this. Let’s see how the next hand plays. I will add a wildcard. He needs to take soil samples; I will bring him a garden shovel.

Tommy had one weepy/angry episode last night that I wrote off to exhaustion from staying up late Friday night. This morning he seems back to normal. Calm as long as we ask nothing of him. After 2 hours on the PS2 I told him to get dressed and find something else to do for a bit. His reaction was angry, snapping backtalk. He flopped into the rocker and deliberately knocked the footstool over. Doug sent him out front and Tommy screamed and howled in rage. It’s too cold to stay outside so he let himself back in but I don’t know what to do with him. If I send him to his room he’ll go bac to bed. If I keep him in the living room he’ll glare, smart off and make all kinds of noises to irritate me. The toddler doesn’t deserve to be exposed to that. There’s no win here.

Tommy is jolly today albeit shaky. I say shaky not in the way that he might fall out of jolly rather that he can’t focus on any one thing, can’t sit still, can’t hold his hands still, etc. His electricity is turned way up. He has outright said “I’m going to have a good day today.” When asked to put that in more definite terms he answered “I’m going to behave.” I wish we could get him out of that mindset since “behaving” is what is expected. I would like once to hear him say, “I’m going to explore the woods today” “I’m going to build X today.” His main goal today seems to be to play the Playstation 2. He is currently obsessed with Ratchet & Clank

Hmmm. Perhaps he and I should start on one of his models today.
       

This Morning
I can hear Tommy up and about. We ask him to bring his medicine down to us when he wakes but lately he doesn’t try or fails to remember. Heading up to check on his mood.