Our Aspergers Teenage Boy

Dad reports:
Tommy did not enjoy walking the dog in shifts and by his last shift he was yanking the dog angrily and calling it a “dumb dog.” I don’t want him to resent the dog.

A new member to the Asperger’s Support Group whose 7 year old was just recently diagnosed dropped by for some items we were giving away and had the pleasure of seeing Tommy in full rudeness. During her visit he stepped in dog mess and he yelled at me that “it’s all your fault. Why do you have to put this stuff out here?!” We had other great quotes like “you owe me Playstation time! You owe me!”

I felt sort of bad as her parting comment was a sad “I guess it doesn’t get better.”

Dad reports:
Tommy ended up going to the mall with us for pictures. The line was short. The grandparents and other children joined us quickly and the pictures were had with a good time. No yelling. No crying (even from the toddler). No fuss.

We headed to lunch and had one outburst from Tommy in the car when I told him he was to go into the bathroom at the restsurant and blow his nose. He barked, “No I won’t!” I expected a big spill at lunch as his plates were hanging over the edge of the table but all went well.

Tommy is now upset because the method I’m using to walk the dog (each child in 10 minute shifts until the dog has some actino) is “unfair.”

Dad reports:
Tommy isn’t smiling and has trouble on his face.

When spoken to he doesn’t flinch. His entire body remains still and he doesn’t reply. It’s that “stoned” look.

I took a toddler toy away from Tommy and he barked “hey! stop.” I explained he needed to listen to his mother and he started yelling “I was listening now I’m not going to listen to you because you took the toy away.”

“He takes everything away and I’m sick of it!”

This is going to be a horrible day.

Dad reports this morning:
Tommy sleeps in right now. Today needs to go well. It will be Santa picture day. Tommy will have the pain of joining Mom and I at the mall to hold a place in line while waiting for the grandparents and other kids to arrrive from church. The noise of the mall and the waiting around will be hard on Tommy.

Last night Tommy wanted to do battle. We set it up so that his staying up until 10pm was a treat and reward for his good day yesterday and kindness to us in the evening. We didn’t use this as a carrot, rather about 7:30pm I called him into the kitchen and said, “it’s your bedtime but..”

When 10pm rolled around I asked for his glasses and he threw a conniption (I’ve never had to spell that word!) He obviously wasn’t ready to settle and intended to stay up reading. He begged for his glasses, lectured about the lack of fairness, refused to hand them over, yelled, screamed, insulted and finally I just reached down and took them to which he screamed, “you pulled my hair! Why are you always hurting me!”

As I walked away he yelled a rude “I’m sorry!” and I ignored it as it was said with little sincerity. Which lead to him barking louder “I’M SORRY! I said I’m sorry! EEewwww. Stop ignoring me!”

Later he wandered into the kitchen and I intervened as he was power chugging milk. He had not gotten to the food yet and was irate that I was booting him from the kitchen. Truth of the matter is I’ve forbidden him from the kitchen but we don’t abide by that well. At the beginning of the summer Tommy weighted in at 206 pounds and a couple of weeks ago he weighted in at 227 pounds. He uses “I’m thristy” as an excuse to raid the kitchen so I’ve told him after lights out he is to get water from the kitchen sink. Last night he barked “I forgot!” An untruth.

He seems to have slept solidly.