Our Aspergers Teenage Boy

Mom reports:
Tommy has been getting mail from military recruiters. His school sent home a note asking for permission to give out the names of high schoolers to various branches of the military and I said no. Dad thinks they may have asked Tommy to give his address during one of their many visits to the school where they give away trinkets (like personalized dog tags). How can they collect information from minors to use as recruitment tools against their parents’ permission? How do I explain to Tommy that he needs to consider other things for his future without crushing his hopes and dreams?

Dad reports:

Connecticut became the first state to file suit against the federal government over the No Child Left Behind Act, claiming the Bush administration has not provided enough money to pay for new testing and programs.

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Dad reports:

I am really torn on the issue of video games. Tommy would play them non-stop, but then again, so did I. The difference is I also got out and rode my bike, climbed trees and hiked. Tommy does nothing physical.

Now, the Playstation was offered to him as a motivator to get up in the morning which wasn’t necessary because he was getting up. It was more of a "being nice to Tommy" since he received a couple of new games for his birthday and hasn’t been able to play them much in the afternoons and evenings. The real problem is that the toddler has been sleeping in and yesterday the boys got so noisy with the game that they woke her. I really don’t want her picking up the waking at the same time as the school aged kids routine; at least, not yet.

I found a compromise. I moved the Playstation to the front of the house which has the added benefit of me being able to watch the interaction between the boys.

Mom reports: Yesterday was Tommy’s 15th birthday. He is so much like a teenager now that it amazes me. A post from last year about Tommy still sums things up.

Mom reports: Our schools have never known what to do with Tommy. Smart but unwilling to work, clueless to peer interactions and lacking in impulse control, traditional behavioral management methods have always failed. This year they decided to put him with a child almost identical in personality. Two Aspergers teens and a teacher who had a few hours of training on Aspergers over the summer. Sounds like a recipe for disaster.

Mom - “Tommy! How was your first day of school?”
Tommy - “They didn’t feed us.”
Mom - “It was only a half day. You’ll have lunch there tomorrow.”
Tommy - “They didn’t feed us.” grumble grumble gripe
Mom - “Xan you tell me something other than that you didn’t get lunch at school today?”
Tommy - “I need a lunch check tomorrow.”

Dad reports:

Tommy’s first day of school apparently went well. It was a half day and his teacher walked him through what will become his routine. He had a great time. Tommy’s only gripe was "They didn’t feed us!" and when we pointed out that it was only a half day of school he groused "they didn’t feed us. I need a lunch check tomorrow."

This morning, despite having a check in his bag, Tommy went on and on about needing a lunch check. I finally had to open his bag and show him exactly where it was so that he could relax. Food is important to Tommy.

Dad reports:

Tommy’s aunt and uncle have posted pictures from the STAR horse show including Tommy in the obsticle course and Tommy riding really well.

Tommy is jolly and thrilled to be heading back to school. He’ll be in for a surprise because the Asperger’s class has been moved to his school and his Dungeons and Dragons buddy will be his classmate. 

Mom reports: I hate inflicting the pain, but I always felt that immunizations were needed and the benefits outweighed the risks. My grandmother had polio and never fully recovered. Yet, after having five children I find myself feeling squeemish about getting my youngest son immunized. Tommy is textbook Asperger's and although he doesn't have enough symptoms for a diagnosis, Noah has the traits that definitely put him someplace on the spectrum. I always blamed my ex-husband because of some of the peculiarities in his personality and even more so in his family members, but maybe it is me. Maybe it is something I unknowingly pass on to my sons. It has been a long time since I found myself feeling the "blame and reason" stuff and I thought I was past this. I know better than to waste time on why and focus on life but with my infant son's first shots just a few weeks away, I find myself very nervous and uncomfortable.