Our Aspergers Teenage Boy

Dad reports:

Looks like another success story! We need Tim clones!

Dad reports:

Tommy has never had a trouble-free bus ride. The bus, and yes he rides a short one, is like his own little captive audience to which he can amuse himself be that through making them laugh or irritating them to tears. His ride is nearly an hour. Now take someone that has Aspergers, confine them to a small noisy space (anyone remember the drone of the engine on a bus? the irritating whistling of the wind through the crooked, unclosing windows? the torn irregular seats? the fear of the driver’s bad driving?), ask them to sit still on an uncomfortable bench seat with the padding shot, throw in other troubled children like one that makes repetitive nonsense noises, and you have created a formula for disaster. Shoot, put someone without Aspergers in that situation and you might have problems.

Over the years, Tommy’s solutions to the bus ride have included the school offering to pay us to drive him to school instead of riding the bus (remember, they are legally obligated to provide transportation), switching buses, varying pickup times (usually by the end of the year he is the last pickup to school and first drop off from school), adding an aide, adding a police officer, writeups, detentions, and all to no avail. I personally think Tommy feels in a position of power over the bus driver and takes advantage of the situation to be defiant. But the main thing that is happening is Tommy is trying to be social and amusing to the other kids and flubs it. After he becomes insulting (probably meaning to be funny) the kids attack him back and it escalates. Once Tommy feels you don’t like him he traditionally has put all his effort into making sure that you don’t like him. I think he has matured beyond that.

I believe on days Tommy wakes early, calmly dresses, and has breakfast that he has more successful bus rides. On days he wakes late and rushes out the door, usually without breakfast, he has rough bus rides. The trouble is Tommy doesn’t want to get up. No matter what I do he resists and it takes me away from helping the other kids prepare for their day. So instead of threats, screaming, yelling, forcing him outside on the porching, physically pushing him out of bed (yes, he will curl up on the floor and continue sleeping), revoking privileges and so forth, today I sat on the bed and read Charles Dickens’ David Copperfield aloud to him. It took 10 minutes but I enjoyed the material as well as the practice reading aloud and Tommy from the beginning of the read and repeatedly through the 10 minutes stated, "you’re better than an alarm clock." He got up 30 minutes before his bus arrived, as opposed to the usually 4-10 minutes, and started off his day calm and relaxed.